Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Blender's Worst List

Blender Magazine recently listed their worst artists in music history. While this is a pretty good rundown, there are a few problems:
1. Calling many of these people "artists" is just wrong. Do you really consider Master P to be an artist? Same for Whitesnake? I think not.
2. 98 Degrees rules! How can you not like the underdog boy band with cutie Nick Lachey?
3. Ranking Yanni #15 is way too low. He should be ranked #2, right after the pan flute-playing guy on the infomercials.
4. Jamiroquai!?!? On THIS list? Come on people. His tunes are fun, dancey and catchy.
5. No band that has performed on an episode of 90210 should be included on this list, so Color Me Badd needs to be exchanged for Fergie or J.C. Chasez cuz they really do blow.
6. Where is Josh Groban on this list? He is an affront to all humanity. He really should stop torturing old women.

However, I applaud Blender for not forgetting the crimes against humanity delivered by Celine "Horsey Girl" Dion, the Gypsy "We Are Trying to be Exotic" Kings, Creed, Michael "I Should Have a Hairball" Bolton, Kenny "Nothing I Play is Even Close to Jazz" G and Lee "I Get Rednecks on Their Feet to Salute" Greenwood. And mostly, thank you, Blender, for including Vanilla Ice. May I never have to see or hear his only famous song karaoke'd ever again.

Thursday, November 30, 2006

Super Yum Pops

It's true. I may be a little intrigued with ways to work alcohol into typically unalcoholic food products. Everyone has a hobby. For instance, last night some friends and I were considering the possibility of pudding shots (instead of the normal jello shots), as pudding is way higher class and more mature than jello.

So today I stumble upon Freaky Ice. Not only does it have a funky name, but these new ice pops are also an ingenious way to consume alcohol with fun flavors like Lemon Stinger, Cherry Fusion, and Passion Cocktail. More importantly, its transportable for those specials days you just can't be lazily watching bad tv.

The inventor of this product should seriously be considered for the next Nobel Prize. Innovation like this needs to be rewarded.

Monday, November 20, 2006

I *Heart* The Bell

Can you imagine ever eating $12,500 worth of Taco Bell? Have you already eaten $12,500 in double decker tacos in your lifetime? If so, I applaud you. Anyway, The Hell is offering $12,500 in Taco Bell bucks if you donate that Playstation 3 you just slashed someone at Wal Mart for. I'm serious. I could totally wait until later for a PS3 if I got a lifetime supply of calories. Just think of the party you could throw...

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

All Hail the Cocktail!

Just as I'm convinced there is a trade or professional association for everything, there is now a museum for everything. Fortunately, this museum is for something good, and it shares valuable information like, "Martha Washington enjoyed daily toddys. In the 1790s, "happy hour" began at 3:00 p.m. and cocktails continued until dinner." If happy hour only began at 3pm in the 21st century...the world might be a more relaxed, peaceful and happy place. Certain world leaders should consider this fine thought....

Monday, November 13, 2006

Short cuts...

My blog buddy and I have been slacking lately, so I thought I'd try to make up for our lack of recent activity with a few fun links to bide your time until we feel inspired to write again:

-- Like those Apple ads with the Mac guy and the PC guy? You'll like them even more in Japanese!

-- Here's a fun NPR story on election ads and the guys who do the voice-overs for them.

-- Someone sent me a link to this video the other day. I actually had this album in junior high.

-- Jagshemash! I thought the movie was a little flat, but here are some of Borat's greatest hits.

Thursday, November 02, 2006


McDonalds' McRib sammich has creeped me out for at least two decades. Perhaps it's because the McRib in no way resembles an actual rib, and I fear the lab where this was created? Or maybe it's the pickles on the sammich, which seem like an odd condiment for any rib-like product. Anyway, a few years ago Mickey D's said they were axing this craptastic sammich for good. However, due to "popular demand," McRib is back for its Farewell Tour Part Deux. Who are these people who "demand" to eat this psuedo-pork McCrappy sammich? It's best to just blame it on Republicans...no other explanation makes sense.

Friday, October 27, 2006

Toasting to Soaps

Never would I have expected Susan Lucci and Tim Russert to be in the same room together, let alone me be in the room too! Yet, just this week, they were side-by-side at the "Broadcasting & Cable's Hall of Fame Dinner" in NYC. Following Mayor Bloomberg's quip about appearing on "All My Children" a few years back (um, yeah, I'm not even commenting on how that's creepy), TV's Erica Kane invited ole Tim to guest star on "All My Children" as well. Would he play her reincarnated love interest? A baby thief? Her long lost sister who had a sex change?

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

This is Me

I saw this photo* yesterday and I was reminded of myself. This is how I feel a lot of evenings as I surf cable's finest programming options and ponder my uber-white skin. Argh.

*Photo altered slightly for beer preference.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Frozen Breakfast

Bacon is often celebrated as a mythical food; a delicacy with a deeply devout following. Late night banter between bacon lovers often produces dreams of new ways to eat the salty strips. So, because of recent chatter surrounding the possibility of bacon ice cream, my SO and I took on the challenge and created Breakfast Ice Cream. This tasty treat is homemade maple ice cream with small chunks of frozen pancakes and crispy bacon pieces. It truly is a frozen breakfast. I'll go out on a limb and say it's truly original. Ben & Jerry will be knocking down the doors any day now.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

This man frightens boy scouts!

Heck, boy scouts have a right to be frightened in a world plagued by rouge helicopters and sports arenas without competing tenants.

Confused? Listen to the gospel according to David Thompson.

Monday, October 16, 2006

Dreams do come true!

So I happened to be browsing recent wrestling results on PWTorch.com when I happened upon this little tidbit -- a former Real World kid is now a WWE wrestler! Mike Mizanin of "Real World 10: Back to New York" has managed to turn his "The Miz" character into the latest wacky crossover in sports entertainment. I guess all those appearances on RW/RR Challenges just weren't paying the bills. We here at STSS wish The Miz the best of luck!

Vodka Tasting - Numero Uno: Battle of the Flavors

A few friends and I have dedicated ourselves to finding the perfect vodka for every occasion. It is not an easy task, as we must subject ourselves to several rounds of sipping many selections. First we must taste each vodka straight up (with an optional ice cube), then each vodka with seltzer, and lastly each vodka in some type of mixed cocktail.

This round included three females and one male. All pledged their devotion and excitement for the event. And, following the event's conclusion, all pledged to participate in future tastings.

Tasting Numero Uno: Citrus and Vanilla Vodkas

Lineup - Part A: Ketel One Citroen versus Absolut Citron
(mixed cocktail for this round: vodka, cranberry and a tad of limeade....named last evening the "East-West Highway")
Winner - Part A: Ketel One easily wins the straight, with seltzer and with mixer categories. Due to how sucky Absolut tasted versus Ketel One, we have all signed contracts banning Absolut Citron from our lives, unless we're serving it to large dumb groups or people we don't really like. One taster repeatedly commented about the "Lemon Pledgey-ness" of the Absolut. The group unanimously thought the Ketel One was very smooth in the mixed cocktail.

Lineup - Part B: Solti Vanilla versus Absolut Vanilla
(mixed drink for this round: vodka and Coke Zero)
Winner - Part B: Stoli Vanilla wins the with selzter category, but Absolut Vanilla wins in the mixed drink category. Absolut Vanilla seemed to hide the fake sweetener in the Coke Zero better than the Stoli. So diet drinkers: heed the warning!

Next up: Battle of the plain vodkas. Stay tuned.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006


I love this ad. In case our audience hasn't seen it, I offer it here. Because I am to please.

Tokyo Report - Part 1

Call it good luck. Call it karma. Call it divine intervention. Whatever it was, it was pretty cool.

There I was in the lobby of my hotel in Tokyo last week when a friend says to me, “Hey, that’s Antonio Inoki!”

Before you ask, let me explain that Antonio Inoki was only one of the very best Japanese pro-wrestlers in recorded history. So famous that he once battled Mohammed Ali! And was in a Bad News Bears movie! And then, just to keep them guessing, he became a member of parliament for a while (the Japanese national parliament, not Parliament Funkadelic, though that would be pretty cool too…). He’s even met Saddam Hussein!

Alas, Mr. Inoki quickly boarded a waiting limo and disappeared into the night before I had a chance to snap a photo. But I now include him in an ever-growing list of pro-wrestling legends I have encountered, however briefly, in civilian life:
  • John Kronos of The Eliminators – I bumped into him and his daughter at Geno’s Steaks in South Philly. Nice guy.
  • The Great Sasuke – Another wrestler/politician. I even got his business card!
  • Detox – A neighbor of mine growing up. He didn’t look like this then.
  • Some buff lady wrestler from Kentucky – I wish I could remember her name. She kindly took photos with me and my friends at a pro-wrestling event we attended in a local gymnasium. She said she worked during the week as a bouncer in a Tokyo gaijin bar.

Stayin' Alive

With all the Congressman Foley madness running rampant in DC, I am obliged to post some new song lyrics penned by a stroke of genius today. The side photo inspired these lyrics. (And for those who don't know, the other guy in the photo is Michael Brown, otherwise known as "Brownie" to George Bush. He's the former FEMA director who was "doing a great job" when the administration was, um, "forgetting" about a big hurricane.)

The new "Stayin' Alive" written by "Professor Callahan":

Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk,
I'm a pompous man: no time to talk.
Broken levies, pages warm, we sucked a silver spoon
When we were born.
And now it's all right. It's ok.
And you may look the other way.
We can surely understand
ABC news' effect on man.

Whether I'm a cruiser or whether I'm a boozer,
I'm stayin alive, stayin alive.
Feel the city breakin' and everybody shakin',
But were stayin' alive, stayin' alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alive, stayin' alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alive.

Well now, you get low and I get high,
And I roll my pants and I stay dry.
Got the seed of pages on my shoes.
Dirty old men... just cant lose.
You know it's all right. It's ok.
I'll live to see another day.
And we don't give a hot goddamn...
'Bout ABC's effect on man.

Whether I'm a cruiser or whether I'm a boozer,
I'm stayin alive, stayin alive.
Feel the city breakin' and everybody shakin',
But were stayin' alive, stayin' alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alive, stayin' alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alive.

You're goin' nowhere. But we won't help you.
Nobody helps you, yeah.
You're goin' nowhere. But we won't help you.
Good luck, good luck on stayin' alive.

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Benefits of the Job

Did you know that no one physically controls the cameras when The Weather Channel is live on tv? It's true! This is one of the fun facts I learned when I got a tour of The Weather Channel studios today. Some dude sitting at a computer moves the cameras. Hilarious! All the people forecasting the weather are sitting in the middle of the studio feeding the on-air people info, who are usually right in front of their version of a newsroom.

And check out this guy...I met him (apparently his name is Marshall, not that I knew this before looking him up on the Internet moments ago) and he is just as cheesy as he looks in this photo. In fact, if you were watching TWC between 9:30 and 10am this morning, you would have seen me walk through the studio behind my new friend Marshall! Ha!

I also learned that the female weather people on tv have stalkers! Apparently there are some weirdos out there who try and stalk these chicks. Ahhh...better add "weather" to the list of fetishes in the world...

Friday, September 15, 2006

Thanks, WB

The "WB" is my favorite double entendre this week as it's quite ironic that I need to say thanks to a few WBs at the same time.

First, I'd like to thank the World Bank for telling me not to vacation in Somalia or East Timor because of terrorism, armed conflict and epidemic disease (the WB released a new report on places not to travel). YUM! While I was considering these locations for my next exotic canoeing adventure, I will now refocus my efforts into vacationing in Iraq, which strangely is not listed. Umm...I can't even fathom how Iraq is a safe and fun place to grab some marginally fresh meat kabobs and see some blown-up historical sites right now.

As for the other WB, the fine WB network, I must say thanks for the memories. The WB this week will evolve into the CW -- the pulling together of UPN and WB shows into a "new" network. So, thank you for the sappy teen drama with dialogue written specifically for an adult audience (Dawson's Creek). And thanks for sharing the tales of a whiney college student in the big city (Felicity). The countless hours I've wasted (and now continue to waste - thank you Noggin for bringing me DC) made life that much happier for me.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

All Hail the Nyfork!

Continuing my fascination with bizarre kitchen products (especially ones that are pimped on late night TV), I stumbled across the Nyfork today. Could this be the world's most perfect eating utensil? No longer do I have to remember to bring the knife AND fork to my table (coffee table that is -- America's favorite place to dine). I really hope to soon see the Nyfork's infomercial. I must learn how many different things this special utensil can cut, cuz I eat pizza with my own greasy fingers (no word on when they will get their own infomercial).

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Everyone's Favorite Cousin

Do you remember Cousin Oliver? Well I certainly do, being the "Brady Bunch" junkie that I am. A certain significant other of mine wouldn't have a clue if I made a reference to Cousin Oliver in passing, but not all of us can be weened on TV. Still, I find making these bizarre TV references part of my life. Anyway, just thought I'd share a "blast from the past" interview with him from today's Post. Funny stuff.

I love the Internet. I love classic TV. And I love the Washington Post, the big city, national paper without feeling the need to act high and mighty.

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

On furries and wrestling...

OK, so I don't think these people technically qualify as furries/fursuiters, but they come pretty close...

This past weekend I decided to take in a bit of culture and caught a show by a little performance art troupe called Kaiju Big Battel (video). Basically it entails a bunch of adults dressed in Power Ranger-meets-Godzilla monster-esque costumes fighting in a pro wrestling ring, complete with elaborate back-stories and a punk rock soundtrack (the opening act was the "Japanese Action Comic Punk" band Peelander-Z -- catch them live at the old ECW Arena on 8/26!). Good guys! Bad guys! A Joey Styles-esqe commentator! Wacky props (the first match involved scaling a 12' paper mache Empire State Building)! Talk about sensory overload.

Even better was the sold-out crowd. Imagine a weird, overly-tatooed hybrid of the crowd of a Ramones show genetically-spliced with the attendees of a ComicCon. And add a few families for good measure. And a few furries (not part of the show, but fans who took it upon themselves to bring their own costumes).

A good time was had by all.

Oh, and while I'm on the subject of furries, Liane Hansen had a guest on Weekend Edtion Sunday this week who has done a little research in the furry phenomenon. Furry is the flavor of the week!

What will geeks think of next?

I found this on Google Video this evening, not knowing anything about the context. Seems the song is from Avenue Q and the images are from the "massively-multiplayer online role-playing game" (MMORPG, in geek-speak) World of Warcraft.

Pretty funny stuff. Hooray for witty dorks!

Monday, August 07, 2006

Microsoft top brass is sooooo declasse...

A little bird sent me this today, pointing out that Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer had taken a page out of Howard Dean's playbook. I don't agree. It is more like Ballmer was trying to prove that he is indeed the whacked-out love child of Dean and CNBC loudmouth Jim Cramer. And if you thought that was bad, take a look at how much this man can sweat. Eeeewwwww!!!

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Kids Love Millionaires!

Never in a million years would I have imagined that my multi-gazillionaire former employer would be signing a kid's head. But heck, I guess it is a lot more likely than him signing someone's ass. Perhaps the office "autopen" should be sent out to sign other body parts...or even better, perhaps an official "Jay Rock" tatoo needs to be created and sold!

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

The Whole World Loves Infomercials

Flipping through the satellite channels (grr...satellite bad...cable good) at a beachside Turkish hotel, I found the holy grail -- a Magic Bullet infomercial! While it has been renamed "Merlin" for European audiences, I was equally dazzled in Turkey (just as I was here at home) by the fruit smoothies the "bullet" whipped and the onions it chopped.

To even further heighten my brief TV viewing, the next channel I flipped to was a "find God" informercial. I know super Jesus people like to take their message to the world and all, but taking their message to a non-Christian oriented country? I wish them luck.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

I would have opted for a Bob Schieffer theme, but...

This isn't new news, but it still makes me laugh so I thought I should share.

Apparently in these great United States there exists this cool little kid who insisted on a "Jim Lehrer News Hour" theme for his 3rd birthday party. This might make him an outcast among the pre-school crowd, but he's a hero in my book. And it'll be great fodder for his college application essay in about 15 years.

Monday, July 03, 2006

So Long TV Genius

Before it gets too late, I must pay homage to the recently departed Aaron Spelling. His dream of creating television dramas aimed at teens/twentysomethings certainly brought much joy to my life over the years. Although I enjoyed the antics of a wacky cruise ship crew, it wasn't until Brandon, Brenda, Dylan and Kelly graced my screen that I knew Spelling really spelled "genius."

Thank you, Aaron, for delighting me with the sagas of rich California kids for the last 14 years (yes, 90210 is still on - check out the SOAP network daily). And thank you, Aaron, for bringing a new era of trashy soap TV via "Melrose Place" for my generation. Without you, my hours of couch potatoing would have been full of just sitcoms.

Note: We will not comment about a certain lame "family-oriented" show on the WB that Mr. Spelling is also credited as producing. His legacy should really try to separate him from that piece of ultimate dullness.

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Threesome Fun

Props go out to television network TV Land for their "Three's Company" marathon over the weekend. More than 48 hours of threesome fun definitely brightened my rainy days. I had forgotten how much I loved the antics of Mr. Furley and Larry. Although I watched this show in reruns as a youngster, viewing it as an adult brought about many questions, such as:

1. Why would two women in their 20's (if not their 30's) want to share a bedroom and sleep in a twin bed?
2. Did people really pretend in the years 1977 -1984 that women never had sex in their bedroom?
3. Did Janet go to college? (We know Jack was in the Navy and then went to cooking school.)
4. Can three people really share a bathroom ALL the time?
5. Why didn't the gang ever get drunk at the Regal Beagle? They always went, but there was no drunkenness.
6. How old was this gang really supposed to be? They seem older than 27.
7. Where was the TV? Their living room had no TV, and that seems sad.
8. Why didn't we ever see them go to the beach? They lived in southern Cali, but we only saw the gang in very few locations.

Monday, June 05, 2006

Elle Meets the Next President!

The South is a weird place -- and yes, Richmond is really the South. A few drinks after a friend's wedding turned into quite a political romp as my gang met up with suprise hotel guest, future presidential candidate Mark Warner. He was a very nice fellow decked out in jeans and a polo shirt. He gets my non-Hillary vote.

But our brush with Virginia political fame wasn't the most exciting event at the Jefferson Hotel on Saturday evening. The Virginia Republican Party was having their annual gala dinner at the same time Mark Warner's presidential support group was having a weekend meeting. Unfortunately, the historic hotel's rotunda area did not turn into a ECW wrestling arena with the Dems table-slamming and chair-bashing some old southern, drunk Republicans.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

America's Secret Club

America's favorite TV show has a secret fan club. There are thousands of people who rush home every Tuesday night to watch "American Idol," yet their family, friends and coworkers have no idea what they are doing between 8 and 9pm. "I need to go do my laundry" and "I need to feed my goldfish" are some excuses that are floated around 7:55pm on Tuesdays. Haven't you noticed the people who dash away from the water cooler as soon as the Katharine's knee-humping is mentioned?

This secret fan club exists because I know them. I know they they hide amongst us. Yet, it isn't until after several drinks that their club membership is revealed when they opine about the gray-haired man shaking his moneymaker.

Why are people afraid to admit they like the cutting comments from Simon? Why do they hide the fact that they can't live without seeing Paula's nightly live TV insaity? Don't these people realize that there are few of us who can resist the utter cheese that brings America so much joy?

Next question for next time...Why are there "American Idol" haters out there? How can anyone hate something so simple and wholesome as a singing show?

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Don't Mess With Burritos

This is where I draw the line. Obviously the US faces some serious immigration issues, but damnit, don't mess with burritos! Next to the quesadilla, the burrito may be the world's perfect food (quesadillas are a little better because they are primarily queso). The warm, thick flour tortilla is but a blank palate for an endless array of tasty latin flavors. America's flavor-challenged Anglo-Saxon background could never create such beautiful dish. Perfectly folded in the one of the world's best bread products, the burrito is worthy of saving for a future of well-fed Americans.

So, take away the taquitos. Eliminate the egg rolls. Stamp out schnitzel. Kick out the kim-chi. But please, battle for the wonderous burrito!

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Smokin' Tinis

My co-blogger and I were both in America's most boring city, St. Louis, this month. While Bruiser hit up the International Bowling Hall of Fame, I sought the Arch city's most secret treat -- the smoking martini. A self-defined cocktail expert, I have not seen a lovely pink smoking pomegranate martini in my many cocktailing escapades around the country. So, while St. Louis may have little to offer in terms of unique culture (outside of bowling, of course), the town does have the only smoking martini I've ever seen. Thank you oh wonderous dry ice...and I hope other places take a cue and make our martinis a little more frisky. [Note to readers: The cocktail smoked more when I first got it. I was just slow on the photographing. Blame it on the 'tinis I guess.]

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Language learning made fun!

Those 8:00 AM foreign language classes in college would have been much more fun if we used texts like the one described in this blog entry. I'm sure any Japanese who studied from this book would blend right in in "da hood".

So, thank you, Randall C. Miller, Jr. You are a valuable asset to the field of cross-cultural communication. And you wear that do-rag well.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Yay Tori!

As one of 90210's biggest fans, I must give a brief shout-out to the new Tori Spelling show "So NoTorious." Full of wacky pop culture references (including famous episodes of 90210), Tori Spelling takes direct aim on her own life and makes fun of herself and her family. It's legitimately sassy, giggle-worthy and fun, something most other TV shows should consider as important ingredients. And, Tori's hair and outfits are pretty normal and attractive, something that can't be said of Donna Martin.

But this show is more than laughs. "So NoTorious" not only redeems Tori Spelling from a Wikipedia entry noting that she is a washed-up actress, but also redeems VH1 from showing hours and hours of crap everyday. VH1 bores cable subscribers with celebrity gossip shows that have no gossip and additional seasons of the "Surreal Life," a show I'm convinced no one watches (and I know a lot of people who watch a lot of crap). Is there a more boring channel than VH1, other than TNT showing continous reruns of "Law and Order"?

Monday, March 27, 2006

Love and Hate at Wal-Mart

I have a love-hate relationship with Wal-Mart. I hate how they force retailers to package things how they want it, censor fine rap music, put small businesses in the toilet, treat their fine employees and lack high-end bottled water. On the other hand, a Wal-Mart Supercenter (especially the fine Supercenter in Martinsburg, WV where they even have seltzer - a rare find for Wal-Mart) is really the only place in America where there is everything that you need. Beer, prescription drugs, guns, somewhat trendy clothes made of crappy fabric in China, $2.50 DVDs, and all things camoflauge...its all under one roof.

I was reminded of my love-hate feelings this morning when I
read a story of a guy who lives in a Wal-Mart for a few days. This real-life story is even better than the crappy Natalie Portman flick where she gives birth in a Wal-Mart (how that didn't ruin her career, I just don't know).

Thursday, March 23, 2006

What's in a name?

For those of us who don't live on the Internet plotting ways to keep Chicken Little around a little longer on American Idol, I thought I should let you know about the latest craze.

"Snakes on a Plane" looks to be the multiplex hit of the summer. Even without a trailer or substantial official website yet, this movie has some serious buzz. So much buzz that NPR ran a story on it today. To really appreciate how sick people are for this otherwise probably crappy movie, take a look at this arguably obsessive fan site -- Snakes on a Blog.

Again, kudos to The Houseguests for having clued me into this pop culture phenom.

And if you have a lot of free time, watch Ultimate Showdown again to see (and finally understand why) Sam Jackson gets the smackdown by a few pythons during the second chorus.

Monday, March 20, 2006

My Target 'tis of thee...

Talk about shock and awe.

I was appalled to learn last week that President Bush’s former domestic policy advisor, Claude Allen, got busted in a sloppy attempt to defraud my very favorite Montgomery County, MD Target store. But according to WeeklyRadioAddress.com, there might be a valid explanation for Mr. Allen's seemingly anti-American behavior.

Last week’s episode was pretty damn funny, too.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale...

If you have ~20 minutes to spare, Act One of this episode of This American Life is worth a listen. These kids sound like a lot of fun. But I feel sorry for the ducks...

Who needs cable, when entertainment like this is free...

This needs no commentary. Just watch it. And remember to turn on the subtitles.

Almost as funny as this.

Props go to The Houseguests for introducing me to these. And curse them for me now having both these tunes stuck in my head!

An gallon of deliciousness in every drop...

To commemorate a loyal ITSC member’s visit to the land of plastic food and dirty underwear vending machines, I’d like to introduce you all to a little site called Engrish.com. It will happy laugh fun time for your pleasure life. Clap clap.

Friday, March 10, 2006

Name This Car!

Naming cars is almost as popular as naming houseplants. Everyone is doing it, especially chicks. Since I'm not a big "car namer," my mom has always named my cars for me. In my younger years, I had Beluga (a lovely aqua-tinted Toyota MR2.I was the coolest chick in high school). Now, I pop around the city in Topper (a friendly blue VW Cabrio).

Anyway, I have a friend who takes the naming of her car very seriously. A car's name must show off its personality, sound pleasant and not be utterly ludicrous. It's essentially like naming a child. This same friend currently is pondering the name of her new-to-her, green VW Jetta. She has a few names in mind, but could use some inspiration. What says green Jetta to you? Hopefully, this picture will arouse you to dream up a fabulous name and then respond below.

Let the games begin!

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Crunches with Condi

Or "Sweatin' with the Vulcan". Or "Gettin' Ripped with Rice". So many potential names for this piece...

According to Reuters, my least favorite NBC4 newscaster, Barbara Harrison, will shock the Washington metro area with some very important news this week -- the intricacies of Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice's workout regimen. Fire up those TiVos! Or not.

What next? Will Donald Rumsfeld co-host a movie review of "Syriana" with entertainment reporter extraordinaire Arch Campbell? Or maybe Alberto Gonzalez will guest host an edition of "It's Academic" with Mac McGarry. (Editor's note: I was shocked to find that there is a Wikipedia site for "It's Academic". People have too much free time.)

Monday, February 13, 2006

Curry and Rice

I submit the following for your viewing pleasure.

Biodata? Who writes this stuff? These guys, I guess.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Fair trade?

I ain't talkin' NAFTA, folks.

No, I'm referring to a recent deal between media conglomerates Walt Disney Co. and NBC Universal that sent "Monday Night Football" announcer Al Michaels packing to NBC in exchange for the rights to Oswald the Lucky Rabbit. Oswald the what? Exactly.

Oh, the indignity!

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Washingtonians Talk Funny

I love Washingtonians (and former Washingtonians). I just asked my co-blogger what he's been up to since he's been quiet as of late, and this is his reponse: You know...the usual. Slacking off. Fighting the war on terror. Watching CSPAN. Memorizing the State of the Union. You wouldn't hear that response from just anyone. I'm very amused.

Friday, February 03, 2006

RPS - Not Just a Kids Game Anymore

Everyone's favorite kids game is sweeping bars across the nation -- Rock Paper Scissors. On Wednesday night at my favorite DC bar (The Rooster), I had the pleasure of competing in the newly formed USA Rock Paper Scissors League (USARPS). Open to the masses, and sponsored by my least favorite brand of water (Bud Light), slightly drunken people are encouraged to pull out their hands and go head-to-head with fellow barmates in hopes of winning a trip to the national tournament in my new favorite city (Las Vegas). While I only came in third, I was awarded a requisite rad RPS hat and watched fellow drinking pal Peter win the night. Next up: a trip across town to watch Peter compete to be the DC RPS winner. If he wins, off to Vegas and television fame he goes! Did I mention that A&E has signed on to telecast the USARPS League finals?

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

DDR and WV

I love West Virginia, not just because of the lovely mountains and availability of moonshine, but because the state has started a new program to tackle obesity in kids. As one of the "largest" states in America, the kids often have weight problems, likely stemming from never learning that "fried" doesn't mean "good for you." So, the state is reaching out to kids and instituting everyone's second fave video game, Dance Dance Revolution, as part of gym class in schools! Seriously. I'm not lying. Read the reports here and here. What's next? Karaoke Revolution becomes music class?

Monday, January 23, 2006

I knew this guy couldn't be trusted!

Never bet on a guy with big hair. As if it weren't bad enough that some dude had been defaming a Kennedy administration official on Wikipedia, it seems Adam Curry (yes, that old MTV VJ Adam Curry) got busted for tweaking the site's entry for "podcasting" to try and give himself more credit for its proliferation that he is actually due.

This is technically old news, but I thought I'd post something here to document STSS' displeasure at Mr. Curry's abuse of the Internets. Shame on you, Hair Boy!

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Light Beer Inventor Has Left the Building

Christmas was a little less festive this year for light beer drinkers everywhere. Before the un-sober holidays, the inventor of light beer, Mr. Joe Owades, passed away. Some would say this man had a monumental contribution to society. I, on the other hand, would say that the words "beer" and "light" shouldn't be used in the same sentence. Thanks to drinking buddy Peter for bringing this important story to my attention, and for never drinking light beer.