Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Live 8 coverage continued

And now for some analysis on the sights and sounds of Live 8, done “Big Bruiser Style”:
  • Black Eyed Peas – Fergie looked hot on the jumbo-tron. But I think their set would have been much more poignant if they had done a cover of “Toy Soldiers” by fellow Kids Incorporated alum, Martika.
  • Concession stands – I was a little surprised by how unprofessional many of the food stalls looked. There were a few trucks/carts, but a good number of people were just selling hot dogs and burgers right off a Weber grill. The Inquirer ran a story saying that Mayor John Street’s brother managed to get a large portion of the rights to the stalls reserved for minorities. Ahhh, Philly…
  • Destiny’s Child – Could Beyonce’s skirt have been any shorter? From where I stood she just looked like a pair of naked legs. Wow! Too bad they had to perform that insipid “Girl” song. All I wanted to hear was “Bootylicious”.
  • Def Leppard – Who invited these jokers? I mean, why not Warrant or Winger? Or Queensryche?
  • Will Smith – Major props for the local boy and his mute pal, DJ Jazzy Jeff. They’re really the Penn & Teller of bubblegum rap. I could have gone home satisfied after they coaxed the crowd to sing along to the theme song to “Fresh Prince from Bell Air”. If only Alfonso Riberto had been there to break into a Carlton dance…then life would be good. On my way back to the subway, I bumped into a woman who had written “Big Willie Style” on her arm with a Sharpie. Oh my!!!
  • Toby Keith – Most of us went for water ice during this set.
  • Angry lady – As I was walking toward my viewing spot of choice, I was yelled at by a nasty lady who barked at me (and others) for blocking her view. Hey lady, from 19th Street you ain’t gonna see nuttin’ anyway, so get off my case and have another Tasykake. Jeez…
  • Linkin Park/Jay-Z – I thought there might be a riot when these Linkin Park clowns went into their 4th song. We were promised a collaboration with H-O-V-A, but I couldn’t help but wonder if a 4th song for a so-so band might mean that that the CEO of Rockawhatever might not show. But my concern was for naught. Out came Jigga, and the crowd went wild. Big pimp this, G8 politician dudes!
  • Kanye West – Pretty darn good. This is the first time I shook my groove thing to a religion-themed rap since Hammer told me to “Pray” so I could make it today.
  • MTV coverage – From my perch on the Parkway, I was way out of earshot of the probing interviews and insightful commentary of VJs like Sway and John Norris. I guess I'll never figure out what this concert was all about.
So there it is. Live 8. They could have raised money, but instead they raised awareness. For a few hours anyway…

4 comments:

Elle Woods said...

My coworkers can attest that I was laughing out loud at your weekend adventures, especially the parts about Will Smith. From what you wrote, I'm assuming DJ Jazzy Jeff WAS in fact there, right?

I didn't know Def Leppard was going to be there -- the horror! I don't know why they wasted 15 minutes on them...

Now, the only thing you didn't cover was the bathroom situation ;)

Rosemary Woods said...

i can't help but notice some sarcasm from Bruiser re: Will Smith and DJ Jazzy...Well, it doesn't surprise me...To paraphrase the Fresh Prince:

So tell you other kids all across the land
There's no need to argue, bloggers just don't understand

Bruiser Woods said...

Elle - Funny that you mention the toilet situation, as I tried and failed miserably to post a photo the Philly Inquirer ran of port-a-potties at the concert. Before you get grossed out, check it out at this link: http://www.realcities.com/multimedia/philly/inquirer/KRT_packages/archive/live8/gallery3/gallery3.html
I think it is the 4th photo in the series.

Rosie - Don't get me wrong...I loved the Will Smith set. But perhaps I still resent Mr. Smith a little for making the crowd insist (in a loud chant) that Philly was "Will's House".

Murphy's Lawyer said...

It ain't just Philly. It's Will's world. He just lets us hang...